I swear, I haven't been this happy in years. I can't even begin to describe it all. I feel I say that every time I want to describe Jose to someone. How can I put it into words? How can I explain the way I feel about him? He fits in my life so perfectly. There is no struggle. There is no fight. There is no grief. All there is....is laughter. Understanding. Respect. He makes my heart race. He makes me smile. He's my biggest supporter. He's all the things I was looking for in a partner. And as I said to him on Saturday night, all I want to do is make him happy in return. I want to be better for him. He and I have all the potential in the world to grow into something beautiful. It's so wonderfully strange to see myself in a couple. I haven't been a girlfriend in ages. It feels fantastic. It feels right. Any dark and lonely feelings evaporated the moment he stumbled into my life. I could go on and keep being corny....but I think you know. This feels so real and so right.
I met his mother Connie on Saturday night. She was a delight and later told Jose I was pretty and have a great personality. I was beaming. Next up: gotta meet his 5 siblings. Yikes.
Jose has hung out with my close girlfriends a few times now and all parties seem to like each other. I met his friend Joey a few weeks ago but his best friend Jonny I didn't meet formally until last week. We hung out at the Deftones show and I got a good vibe from him. I really want Jose's friends to like me, so I'll just do what I do best and just be myself.
Things are moving right along. Jose is my plus one at my company's Christmas party this upcoming Saturday. I think my boss is gonna like him :) As for my mother, Jose got a bit of an icy welcome at first but my mom warmed up to him a little on Thanksgiving weekend. I really want her to get used to the idea of him and hopefully tolerate him. She doesn't have to love him....just like him enough.
We have broached the subject of sex and intimacy. Both of us are ready to take it to the next level, we just don't know when that will be. Soon, we both hope. We'll know when it'll be the right time. In the meantime though, the make out sessions have been intense. My desire for him has been gradual. I'm hitting an all time peak nowadays haha....
He said something wonderful to me the other night. He said, "I'm not going anywhere."
No one has ever said that to me. The promise that he's going to stick around. That he's willing to put the time in. I'm so used to guys getting up and leaving me. All my life I feel like I've been chasing after boys, begging them to just please stay a little longer. It feels good to know he's mine, that he's not leaving.
It feels great to know that someone thinks I'm worth their time and effort. I am validated. I am secure.
But most of all, I am truly happy. I said that right? HAPPY :D
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